the last days of 2011

Monday - Missions on my mind...
the year-end conferences... reaching up and reaching out according to His will.

Tuesday - Thankful for...
answered prayers this year... constant comfort and provision when I least expected it.

Wednesday - Waiting...
PATIENCE, JOY, and contentment in the present.

Thursday - Take time to...
prepare for next semester.

Friday - Future plans...
what's next?

Saturday - Scripture focus...
a passion for the Word.

Sunday - Season to celebrate...
time that I do have for myself.

(fall semester) favorites!

most common sayings:
"it is what it is" / "now i know" / "don't shout 'Miss Davis', raise your hand"

least favorite sayings:
"put it on your Christmas list" / "ask for it for Christmas" / "shhhhh"

church experience: John Partington @ Riverside - "The Importance of Centrality"

treat: hot chocolate

restaurant: avanti's

study place: Normal Public Library

vacation: 2 days with this girl

inspiring moment: All Campus Worship; gaining the respect of 23 3rd graders; Los Pinguos

way to spend alone time: reading

way to give: being a part of Operation Christmas Child

verse: Jeremiah 29:11; the whole of Psalm 103

message: "seek & find" - Andrew Whalen

song: "10,000 Reasons" - Matt Redman

fruit: apple

find/win: an xbox 360 + kinect!

book: Unspoken: Bathsheba by Francine Rivers

new thing: doing Christmas differently

craft: ones i'm making for christmas... which can't be made public knowledge yet ;)

movie: the Help

show: parenthood

drink: hot chocolate

website: brainpop.com

snack: peanut butter ritz sandwich crackers

adventure: chicago

day trip: Tanner's

first: teaching a seminar at Cornerstone's fall retreat; photographing a wedding; taking dance lessons at homegroup (waltz, swing, 2-step)

book of the Bible: the psalms

breakfast: waffles with peanut butter

new hobby: sunrise yoga

cookie: chocolate chip

accomplishment: running the Pumpkin Festival Run (2 miles) in 25 minutes

financial investment: rain boots and a raincoat

reminded: we are His sheep and He is our shepherd... He will provide and He will guide.

focused prayer: wk1

if there's one thing i know about myself is that i do well with plans. a to-do list is a form of a plan and this past semester mr.to-do and i became quite the best of friends. we worked hourly together and planned for each following day. it's how we worked - that to-do and i. another thing that i know about myself is that i do well when i have a focus. i can whip out lessons like it's nobody's business, when there is a focus. evidence of this = the semi-procrastination/semi-works-well-under-pressure situation i found myself in about 10 days ago when i needed to plan, create, and present a social studies unit in a matter of 20 hours. it got done, for the most part... and we'll leave it at that.

so knowing these 2 things about myself - this is where i am now: below are focuses that i found for myself for each day, a few weeks ago, and i prayed briefly about each. this coming week, i will be praying more. i was inspired by one of my friends who prays specifically for each of her children on a particular day of the week... it seems effective as it has become a routine for her. i think having prayer focuses become a routine of mine would be very beneficial, because prayer is an area that i struggle with being consistent with. so, if you're reading this, i would ask that you would join me in prayer for at least one of these areas. i hope to update with prayer focuses weekly, sometimes they may change and sometimes they may stay the same... we'll see!



Monday - Missions on my mind...
i was a part of one mission by giving my hair away. some days, i miss that long hair but then i remember that being a part of something bigger than myself at times comes with sacrifices.

pray for: Molly in Honduras... Laura in Italy... Alicia at IHOP... Cornerstone at ISU...
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Tuesday - Thankful for...
relationships that continue to encourage and bless me. (i.e. Dakins & Kenyan)

pray for: strength & refreshment to the people; blessings over the ministries they lead.
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Wednesday - Waiting...
for the PB to my J, the cheese to my mac, the best friend i'll marry.

pray for: patience; strength and discipline to prepare now, for then.
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Thursday - Take time to...
become more passionate about the things i love.

pray for: the resources to discover more in a way in which i understand.
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Friday - Future plans...
what's next after i graduate? teach at Sheridan? teach somewhere else?

pray for: discernment; to seek first the kingdom of God; opportunities.
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Saturday - Scripture focus...
be in the Word more instead of simply reading stories incorporating scripture.

pray for: priorities in the right order; more of a desire to be in the Word daily.
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Sunday - Season to celebrate...
forever friends.

pray for: growing in this community we have; each of us to follow the Lord's leading.
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*prayer provides a way of exchange between God and ourselves. to sit in his presence and to present these matters of the heart and mind before him can result in change, provision, and can give us more reason to praise His holy name.

from tears to joy in 16 weeks

These past 4 months have been, in some ways, rather life-changing. In one area in particular, there is evidence of growth in relationships, matured behavior, and an increase of knowledge as I carry down on this road of transitioning from pre-service teacher to full-time teacher. Details of the evidence of these aforementioned points are described below.

Going into this semester, I was beyond excited. I was excited to meet the students that I would spend this year with, I was excited to meet and get to know the teacher who would mentor me through what would be my first unofficial year of teaching, and I anticipated learning the ins and outs of a school environment from a teacher’s perspective. I observed and participated, this semester, in the field of teaching for about 24 hours each week. I co-led discussions, taught lessons, led small groups and large groups in discussion, facilitated whole class instruction, prepared materials, attended parent-teacher conferences, attended an IEP triennial meeting, attended professional development meetings, participated in event planning, and began professional and personal relationships with quite a few of the staff members at Sheridan Elementary.

In August, I entered this school as a student. A student who was willing to learn, feeling optimistic, and excited for the months that lay ahead. I met 21 students and a teacher in her last year of teaching. But, unexpectedly and yet fortunately, I began to face trials and had to overcome obstacles to get to where I am now. At times, I felt very bitter, discouraged and on the verge of quitting the program. But, I never did. I persevered, with the help of great and heartfelt encouragement from a variety of sources and made use of the determination that I knew existed within me. At times, it is hard to admit that you face these sorts of trials - ones that bring you to tears and make you wonder why you would be at such a place - but it’s when you can stand on the other side of the trial feeling accomplished and refreshed, feeling that the struggle was somehow worth the outcome of it all.

One thing that I was reminded of throughout this semester was that every day is a new day. Earlier this semester, I would teach lessons and feel as if I held absolutely no authority over the students. They took the control away from me and I feel that I let them do so because I didn’t know how to be forceful and kind at the same time, in their eyes. Some days I would feel extremely discouraged and lost because of such situations, but I took away from each of my experiences something to grow me. I didn’t want to lose the students’ affection and I didn’t want them to not like me, and so because of that, I feared being authoritative. Yet, through much “practice”, I have learned how to be in control and even quoting my clinical supervisor, I have been “in the zone”. Oh, to be there is amazing - to develop and maintain control during instruction is amazing! And wonderfully yet surprisingly to me, the students still love me. One of the most common requests asked of me, that I can recall in this moment, from our class of now 22 students is, “Can I have a hug?” Surely, yes, absolutely - I am more than willing to oblige! For the most part, respect is given to me as I give it to both my students and my CT. Reaching this point certainly did not come easy or did it happen overnight, but by grace given and being able to offer consistent, bold, and sure love, it happened. I have grown a lot this past semester and I am grateful for where I stand today.

Helper

in a month's time, i've experienced the range where on one end exists the highly undesirable receipt of a student teaching disposition addressing areas of demanded improvement and where on the other end exists words of encouragement such as this:

"I am amazed and thrilled for you as you continue to grow and stretch yourself... your goals are well thought out... thank you for your extra effort and continual determination to be the best you can be!" - my ISU student teaching supervisor
the past 14 weeks of this semester have taught me a lot. i feel like everything i experience teaches me a lot, but in some way this a lot is different - and i want to remember the specifics of this a lot for many reasons.

sometimes you don't realize where you are, who are you, or how you present yourself... until a situation arises that reveals something special to you, or you go somewhere new, each which can lead you to reflect on how things used to be. some of my situations in this season have consisted of a calling of me to be humble, to put aside my pride, and to surrender myself under the authority of the men (or women) that God has placed me under. yet, with these revelations and calls for a change of heart, mind, and/or attitude, i encountered the extreme level of difficulty that acting upon this all places a person at.

and yet through all of the trials and tears and tiring days, the Lord sustained me. He asks us to seek... and when we do, He promises us that we will find. He commands us to make our requests known to Him, for He longs to work in our lives so that we may have even more reason to glorify Him. He will answer us, He will set us free, He is on our side - and most of all, He can be trusted.

i came across this verse (psalm 118:5-8) last week. it's a true representation of the situation i've found myself frequently in this semester...

i was in distress (and still sometimes am) and i called upon Him. i asked God to renew my joy for teaching, i believed for His presence to fill the classroom each day as i walked into sheridan elementary, and i prayed so intently for what was on my heart. i cried in secret and i cried amongst friends. my 23 students were constantly on my mind and i yearned to be strong and grow as a professional and as a teacher during the trials that this semester presented me. at times, i was angry, frustrated and sad. at other times, i just wanted to give up... out of fear... of man and at times, of simply failing.

this is my heart. wide open.
and i share this publicly, with whoever may be reading this, so that my experiences can serve as another story that testifies the goodness of the Lord. maybe you don't believe in God or believe in His power, but know- it is real and He only has plans to grow you up as a successful beloved child of His. whether your days are joyous and complete or overwhelming and you're desperate for help - i would encourage you to put your trust in Him. seek Him, read His words and be reminded of His promises. He knows your heart more than you do... just as He knew why each of the tears fell from my eyes nearly every other day just a few weeks ago.

Lord, you are worthy to be praised - thank you that you are bigger than any situation and that you are always with us. thank you also for your unfailing promises.

what i love about right now

i am inspired by this to write this:

"I am happiest when I am most grateful--when I am aware of my surroundings and what exactly
it is about this very moment that makes me feel content."

"I think that's what gratitude really is--recognizing every bit of wonder in our surroundings..."

i love how early the sun shows up in the morning.
i love that i got to spend 5 hours tonight with my mom and ben.
i love how much we laugh when we're together.
i love that the train is not going through our backyard for once.
i love that my heart is full of good feelings.
i love good deals.
i love that christmas is coming so soon.
i love the inspiration that has come to me to do things differently this year.
i love that we are currently watching elf in our living room.
i really like the curls in my hair.
i like how warm and cozy my bed is during the night.
i love that 4 of my closest friends are within a 7 minutes drive of my apartment.
i love that new friendships are growing.
i like potlucks.
i love that grace exists.
i love blogs that inspire.
i love snail mail.
i love that praying makes my heart more tender for people and situations.
i like that my hair is growing and that almost all of it can be held in a ponytail.
i love that one of my closest friends is engaged to be married this coming spring.
i love that things change.
i love the sweet smiles that come from baby Ju.
i love good conversations with old, but so good, friends.
i love spontaneity and being free as a bird.
i love that i am learning what it's really like to be a teacher.
i love the atmosphere that exists at the public library.
i love coffee hound's $2 latte tuesdays.
i love that God changes hearts and transforms lives.
i love that we get an extra hour of sleep tonight.
i love that i made a commitment to something after i graduate.

i want to remember some of the best things about these days, with these friends, and in this season of life. time flies, and i don't want to miss a thing.

then and now

practice what you preach

in 2 weeks i will be teaching a seminar on living simply.
currently, i am designing my lesson and brainstorming points.
i am also, somehow simultaneously, scheduling more things and making longer to-do lists.
i am excited to share what the Lord is putting on my heart.
and trusting Him that if i weren't this busy, i wouldn't be able to teach this topic from a real life point of view and testify that simpleness is possible.
it's about balance.
it's about focus.
it's about qualitative and not quantitative.
i'm excited to learn more as i dive into this... the topic, the teaching, and the role.

a lot can happen in a year.

we've lost 60 pounds between the two of us.

15/30

silhouette.

(summer) favorites!

church experience: "Rock Solid" - Bill Hybels @ Willow Creek

treat: frozen yogurt

restaurant: Chili's

study place: Starbucks

vacation: 2 weeks in Peoria

inspiring moment: Steamboat Classic

way to spend alone time: reading books and blogs

way to give: donating hair; volunteering for water.org @ Brad Paisley's concert

verse: James 3:17

message: "Love: a most vehement flame" - Jeff Thames @ The Garage

song: "Hold Me" - Jamie Grace

fruit: peach

find: peacock ring @ Third Sunday Market

book: and the Shofar Blew by Francine Rivers

new thing: headbands; exploring and pinning on Pinterest

craft: fabric camera strap

movie: gnomeo and juliet

drink: green tea frappuccino; almond milk

website: IHOP 24/7 Prayer Room

snack: celery & PB

adventure: 5 mile walk w/ Chelsey... coffee, library, park, and praying

day trip: Arthur, IL (Amish Country) w/ Kate and Leah

first: House of Blues (Neon Trees concert); Balloons in the Park

book of the Bible: Jeremiah

breakfast: oatmeal

"first hour" moment: being one of the first to welcome sweet Juliette Grace

"first day" moment: reading Beautiful to Georgia Willow (& her mama)

new hobby: running

cookie: oatmeal chocolate chip

accomplishment: 2 consecutive weeks of no ice cream!

a last day

today, we kept to our most usual routine of breakfast, sesame street, sid the science kid, word world, playing, a walk, lunch, reading, and rest time... but threw in an enjoyable out-of-the-ordinary trip to the playground.

today also was our last day together.

there will be no more mornings of lots of peanut butter (on bread, on sandwiches, on crackers, on celery)... no more holding that cuddly little boy as he sleeps in my arms for an hour or more... no more building towers or towns with blocks and cups and legos...

there will be no more whys after every statement or request i make... no more lounging around as we hear of the word on the street or what elmo's thinking about today... no more quiet but excited laughter when we do or make something incredible...

there will be no more humming of motors or vacuums or weedwackers... no more books read about wind turbines or rugs used as yards to be mowed... no more main street or garages or getting new tires on a deal of buy one get one free...

there will be no more dinosaur shaped sandwiches... no more chasing bubbles or picnics on the patio... no more applesauce on baby pancakes... no more tickle wars and airplane games... no more puzzle making, ball bouncing, or xylophone playing...

but although this was a last day, it was a good day. it reminded me of how wonderful this summer has been, including spending many days of complete routine with these 2 boys. these boys are probably the calmest, most laid-back kids that i have ever met and our mornings were most often just quiet and simple and good. overall, this season of summer has been just that - quiet and simple and good.

do you have a "last day" that's on your mind? feel free to share!

AND, do you know what comes after last days??! ... first days! (to be continued... :))

frozen fruit*

i joined Pinterest about 2 weeks ago, created 11 boards regarding photography, decorating, crafting, things to remember for the future, etc... and have already pinned 223 things and liked 9. i probably spend too much time exploring others' "pins", but i think the idea of Pinterest is genius. in the past, i have bookmarked everything i see online that i don't want to forget and then very quickly have hundreds of bookmarks and no idea what each is for. Pinterest is set up in a very organized and simple way and honestly, i'm just kinda in love with it. i've been so inspired to try so many things because the creativity and great ideas of others is literally at.my.fingertips!

i was inspired by a few women and their idea of a Pinterest Challenge... to DO your own spin on something you pin.

so here goes my Pinterest Challenge #1 - frozen fruit*

*fruit that is dipped in chocolate and then frozen

what you will need:

(oats not pictured)

frozen banana bites.
(originally seen here)

my recipe isn't vegan, but i did use natural peanut butter!
and instead of coconut, i sprinkled on some oats from a Bear Naked granola mixture.

chocolate kiwi popsicles.
(originally seen here)

my chocolate coating wasn't as smooth and crispy... but then again i didn't use coconut oil as the recipe calls for either...

NONETHELESS, both treats were fun to make and yummy to eat! and i am left with one final concluding thought... you really can dip/coat ANYTHING in chocolate!

9/30

someone you love.

i adore my mom. as friends have faded in and out of my life throughout the years, she hasn't. she is always there and she supports me in everything i do. she is patient, kind, dedicated and selfless. she is fun and silly and can always make me laugh. i am so grateful to have her as my mom and one of my best friends...

8/30

a bad habit.
(piling up clothes... "dirty" piles and "clean" piles)

7/30

fruit.

6/30

from a low angle.

5/30

from a high angle.

4/30

something green.